It’s Off to See the Wizard…

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Psst!… NO. This is not a Halloween post!

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Flattened. Hit by a house. With only my red slippers to show for it.

Sometimes that is how I feel – like the Wicked Witch of the East only seemingly in control of her own “Munchkin Land.”

Life in Oz Isn’t Always What it’s Cracked Up to Be…

I hate feeling mean and cranky. I really dislike being the household “witch.” And occasionally, I just want to step down as the “leader of Munchkin Land.”

Patience… remember the patience I managed to maintain last week? I was proud of it for a reason – because it is H.A.R.D. to maintain.

Especially on those days when minute after minute, hour after hour you:

A. Hear a multitude of munchkins whining.

Munchkins: Do I really have too?!???!!! (said in the whiniest voice possible)
Me: YES! (pause as I wait for them to complete whatever very reasonable task that I’ve asked of them. Followed by…) NOW!

B. Listen to a plethora of ridiculous complaints.

Munchkins: But MOOMMM! I don’t want THAT piece of candy? I want THAT one! You never let me have what I want!
Me: ????? OK. At least I’m consistent?

C. Have (in general) been bombarded by an overabundance of annoying behaviors.

Munchkins: (no need for words, just A LOT of wiggles when the munchkins should be still…)
Me: STOP! Please STAY. STILL!

Yep, just call me wicked and throw me under a house…. because the Munchkins are restless…and maintaining control of Munchkin Land can occasionally make me feel like such a meanie, a grouch, and an all-around b-witch.

The Real Witch of Oz

Some days, some weeks – are worse than others. But, regardless of the day there IS always a heart behind this seemingly “mean mom.”

Do my kids know that I am really not this mean, definitive “no” person?
Do they realize that Motherhood – what they see as their mom – doesn’t always define me?
Do they understand that I am also human with feelings that sometimes get hurt?

Probably not. (And in my heart I know that is OK for now.)

Yet, sometimes I need to remind myself that the “witch” really is:

  • Kind. (I work hard to be a good friend, wife, and mother…)
  • Loving. (I have a huge heart that I willingly open to many…)
  • Understanding. (I try – unbeknownst to my kids – to always listen to all sides of every story…)

But it can be hard! Because I realize (to them) I seem overly strict. And I know (to them) I seem to say “no” more often than “yes.”  And yep, I even know sometimes I am wrong (and maybe I don’t admit it to them.)

But inside my heart, during every second of every hour, no matter HOW batty they are driving me – I REALLY DO love them. And sometimes, I guess I have to realize that loving “my munchkins” may occasionally place me on the wrong side of the “broom” in their eyes.

  • I’m not making excuses for my daily occasional bad moods.
  • I’m not justifying the fact that many times sometimes I do need to keep my patience more than I do.
  • And I’m not saying that I probably should admit every once in a while that I’ve made a mistake or two or three, or…

BUT it can be hard when you rarely get recognition, when you constantly hear complaints, and when you always seem to be labeled as the Wicked Witch – Ruler of Munchkin Land.

It’s hard because ultimately, I’m only human (even though my munchkins may think of me as a “super-human mom”).

Follow WHAT Yellow Brick Road!?

In a perfect world… My munchkins would always know how much I loved them.
In a perfect world… they would understand that all my “demands” are meant to help mold them.
In a perfect world… I wouldn’t have to yell, or feel so demanding, or be so strict and so seemingly mean.

But alas, I will have to admit that I don’t ever see my household being a “perfect version of Oz.”

And, in my not-so-perfect world, sometimes the only thing I can do to refocus all the negative “munchkin energy” is to remember that I mean well.

Because, in parenting, there is no “yellow brick road” leading us all directly to the “Emerald City.” There is rarely a crystal clear path to what’s right, what’s wrong, what best, and what’s worst when it comes to keeping peace in my munchkin’s land.

And ultimately, when all hell breaks loose, and the munchkins revolt, and the husband may all-too-many-times also feel the side effects from my day-long “witch’s wrath,” – I think how lucky I am to also have my “Toto…”

To sit with me when I’m sad. To listen to me rant when I don’t need anyone to talk back to me. And to ofter me unconditional love – even when I’m cast as the Wicked Witch of the East.

Forget the Wizard – I’m off to see Toto…

Halloween

See! I told you this wasn’t a Halloween post… well, sort of! If you would like to see the real little munchkins all decked out for Halloween, check out my On-the-Go Momma Facebook Fan Page! 🙂

Leave a comment! How do you deal with the days where you feel like you’re constantly saying “NO!” in Munchkin Land? Do you ever need to remind yourself that you aren’t always a b-witch? Do you have a “Toto” in your life?

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I am linking this post up with Kelly’s Breakroom and My Life and Kids
for their finding the funny Link-up. (Hope you found this funny??)

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I am “pouring my heart out” and also linking up with Shell at Things I Can’t Say for her “Pour your Hear Out” blog carnival. Visit there to check out some other great bloggers who are doing the same!

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29 Responses to It’s Off to See the Wizard…

  1. Oh, Kate. I understand these days/weeks. I have them too! It’s always a balance (for me) of helping them grow without squelching them. But some days it’s just so hard! And you wonder if you’re right and you wonder how to fix it if you’re wrong and you wonder if they love you and know that you love them. Yes, yes, yes and yes. Hugs. 🙂
    Missy | The Literal Mom recently posted..NaNoWriMo – Advice from an Expert

  2. Shell says:

    I do have to remind myself that I’m not always a witch. B/c I do feel like I say NO a lot and snap at my kids.

    Every once in a while, I take a deep breath and say yes when it’s not going to hurt anything.
    Shell recently posted..Pour Your Heart Out: How Many Glasses Is Too Many?

    • Kate says:

      Good advice Shell! Sometimes it doesn’t hurt to say yes the the kids… I really need to try and do that more often. (Maybe I’ll start tomorrow? 🙂 ?)

  3. Tatum B. says:

    Oh Kate did I relate to this one! Especially….

    “BUT it can be hard when you rarely get recognition, when you constantly hear complaints, and when you always seem to be labeled as the Wicked Witch – Ruler of Munchkin Land.”

    I have been totally feeling like the Wicked Witch lately. Of course my daughter upset by not always getting her way and calling me a “meanie” or a “mean mom” doesn’t help 🙁

    I keep trying to remind myself that someday (Lord willing) she’ll know that I may have made mistakes along the way but I really did have her very best interest at heart!

    • Kate says:

      I know! That is what I try to tell myself too Tatum! I hope my kids will see that I did my best… But, it is still not ever fun to feel mean 🙁

  4. Ashley says:

    This is such a great analogy post that it’s not even funny (well maybe a little 🙂 ). It’s amazing how much we dedicate into each and every day, how much stress comes up, how often we feel like the only thing we say is no. It really does make you feel like the Wicked Witch sometimes!
    Ashley recently posted..When a Facebook Status Says Too Much

    • Kate says:

      Ashley, I sometimes find myself saying “no” to things I don’t even really need to say no too – out of habit! Now that is one bad habit I need to start trying to break!

  5. Adrienne says:

    I often wonder how my kids see me. Do they think I’m mean and nasty all the time? God, I hope not. I have my days, and I HATE whining! nothing triggers momzilla like a whine!
    Adrienne recently posted..Breathe

  6. Jen Has A Pen
    Twitter: jenrambles
    says:

    I work with college students on a daily basis. While many of them are perfectly delightful, MOST of them are entitled and spoiled and incapable of handling any sort of disappointment. You are being a good mom. I’m sure you were told “no” a million times. I was. Thankfully. You keep on being strict. It’s got to feel crummy some days, but I am sure it will soon pay off! With every day I go to work, I am thankful I thought my mom was mean. 😉

    • Kate says:

      I hear you on that one! I also teach as an adjunct in at a local college… and even though there are still some GREAT college kids out there – sometimes, I have to say – I definitely think they make me a “stricter” mommy. Especially when it comes to teaching my kids respect and manners!

  7. Lisa says:

    The very hardest part of parenting for me has been the times I had to make decisions that made my kids really angry with me- wow- the comments that can really sting come out at those times. I’ve found that when my “mom” self-esteem has taken a beating, I need to spend time with the people who actually think I know a thing or two – my friends – the people who totally get the struggle. A telephone conversation, a shared cup of coffee – and I feel (at least temporarily!) fortified to face the tough choices. Wow- I feel so much more sympathy for my own mom – the things I said and did! I take solace in knowing that now, years later, I really appreciate her wisdom and sacrifices – and I can very easily forgive the things that I don’t think she got right- hey we all just try to do our best.
    thanks once again Kate for putting it all together in an honest and funny way!

  8. Ado says:

    Such a good and heartfelt post – thanks for your honesty.
    I am a bwitch pretty much on a daily basis. I wish I wasn’t but it turns out that I am. Just like kids have moods, get tired, need protein, or feel overwhelmed – I’ve come to accept that moms do, too. It ain’t easy being a mom! It really is a thankless job – and all that stuff about whether or not they see we’re not really naysayers and nags all the time – well, only time will tell. They’ll probably forget all about in in their adulthood. One hopes.
    As for Toto we got a puppy last year, I thought it was my Toto – turned out to be a pretty neurotic dog that needed Prozac and nipped at/bit the kids – I brought in a dog whisperer who took one look at that dog’s nonstop up and down jumping and neediness and said it was not a family dog, and the breeder should not have sold it to a family with young kids. Long story short my Toto is now thankfully in a happy home with two retirees. So…I haven’t even got a Toto to turn to, but I do have the bathtub and my blog. (-:

    • Kate says:

      We totally lucked out with our “Toto.” Completely. He is really our “first born.” We got him about a year and a half before we had our oldest daughter – and boy did he ever get spoiled in that year and a half. But he really has been such a great guy to have around our home. He deals with the kiddos (he’s been punched, hit, pulled, dragged AND IGNORED – successfully without any nips). With that being said… I don’t know if we would ever consider getting another one for the very same reason you had to find a new home for your “Toto.” I think, when the time comes where we find ourselves dogless – I may just have to turn to my bathtub and blog too 🙂

  9. Natalie @MamaTrack
    Twitter: mamatrack
    says:

    I know this feeling. Right now, I’m a giant ball of hormone rage. It’s really challenging to be the mom I want to be.

    But I bet we are both doing a pretty good job. We’re probably just harder on ourselves than we should be. Right. Please?
    Natalie @MamaTrack recently posted..Everyday Magic at the Zoo

    • Kate says:

      I’d like to hope that were both doing a good job…? (fingers crossed!) I for one know that I am always hardest on myself – more than any other person. My expectations for myself are sometimes ridiculous. I do find that the longer I am a parent, the easier it seems to becomes to lower those expectations of myself. And in this case, it is the one time where lowered expectations would be good! 🙂

  10. Megan - Best of Fates
    Twitter: bestoffates
    says:

    Adorable! You did a great job posing – though I love his head turn, as though he’s above it all!
    Megan – Best of Fates recently posted..Forcing a Dog to Read a Book (Or Why I Need To Get Out More)

  11. Kelley says:

    thid was great! I loved the Wuzard of Oz analogy. You are so righ. There just isn’t any clear path, no yellow brick road. We just do the best we can with what we know! So glad you linked up. 🙂
    Kelley recently posted..Finding the funny. Have you seen it?

  12. Anna says:

    Such a great post, Kate! So much of parenting is learning how to be a good parent… loved to see the humor you brought to it!

    Thanks for linking up to Finding the Funny!
    Anna
    Anna recently posted..Lessons from Linda: The Walking Farts

    • Kate says:

      Can’t wait to visit all the other post over the weekend when I get time to catch up on my blog reading! Thanks for hosting such a fun link-up!

  13. Anna says:

    Hey Kate,
    Your post was one of the most popular ones at last week’s #findingthefunny! We’re featuring you tomorrow!
    Anna
    Anna recently posted..Greek Girls Can’t Jump

    • Kate says:

      Wow! Really? That’s wonderful… it’s funny (no pun intended!) but as I was reading through some of the other posts I started to worry that maybe mine wasn’t funny enough! (Because there were some REALLY FUNNY posts!) So glad that people seemed to enjoy it!

  14. Pingback: Finding the Funny #2

  15. Megan - Best of Fates
    Twitter: bestoffates
    says:

    But the munchkins are so adorable! Totally worth it.
    Megan – Best of Fates recently posted..When Your Best Friend Has Thyroid Cancer: Stage One (Doctor Who?)

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